Musings on a sleepless night

There are many things why Avon Sleep Therapy didn’t help me sleep tonight: I ate Wiggles a few hours before, I slept in the afternoon, and I was still hungover by the writing I did just before bedtime.

I was reading Paolo Coelho’s blog post about fear, and it mentioned listing your fears every year. I decided to write mine and I wrote myself a two page back-to-back list. I actually just listed 5 for tonight, but the explaining of the root cause of the fears, also mentioned in the post, was what took my time.

Fear # 1: Asking questions. Asking questions is as basic as breathing, I know.

Fear # 2: People. They are unpredictable, violent, and mysterious. This should have been my top one. All of my succeeding fears all eventually lead to this fear. The cause is my abnormal introvert personality. I really think so.

Fear # 3: Not being happy in the future.

Fear # 4: Not LIVE.

Fear # 5: Anything I don’t know. This fear is preventing me from trying new things and making mistakes.

After my hands grew tired, I realized that throughout the years, it was just hard for me to accept things. I grew bitter and generally disliked the world. I didn’t understand that everything is a process. I tried to be everything at the same time. I fed my fears by being a coward. I expect that when I wake up my dream has happened. I am an over-thinker, and not a doer. I wasted my time by thinking that I was wasting my time. I always thought I had a second chance.

But life only happens once.

And I am lame at goodbyes.

High Heels and Basketball

Last Friday night was my sister’s JS Prom at Alta Cebu Garden Resort (a very mouthful name) located at Cordova Cebu. The event started at 7pm. I was the designated chaperon/picture taker. I opt not to use the word photographer because people are so sensitive with that word. *sigh*

Though the theme was Masquerade, for me, the night was about unbelievably high heels. There was even one who wore 5-inches, but I think she walked with them pretty well. Some girls wore lovely shoes, I could have taken pictures of feet rather than of faces. Alta is a very nice place, but it wasn’t so good for the shoes because the ground was coarse and rocky.

I should shut up now and show some pictures.

This was the last minute carton mask I made for her, hand-stitched. Poor needle bent because of too much force. Hihi

Sister’s cocktail dress belt detail

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A cry from a cry baby.

Two songs: Marry Your Daughter and Butterfly Kisses.

Please play them while you’re taking a bath, or lying in bed trying to sleep, or something. Or when your beloved is around. Please don’t sing it out loud. Please don’t quote them in your texts. Please don’t quote them in your Facebook statuses. Please.. just.. don’t.

Please save me from bursting into tears in public. Or from trying to stop bursting in public. I look as equally ridiculous.

All I ask is a little sensitivity.

Hooray for cushy internet, reading, and sleep time!

The past few days I’ve been going to school feeling like a zombie that yesterday, Thursday, my head gave me a lethal headache. I slept so early, I woke up today having 12 hours of sleep. Even with that sweet amount of sleep, I still feel tired.. and annoyed of this monthly pain.

Tonight though, I have to spoil myself while I can because next week will be midterms week. Tonight means 9gagging, reading The Hunger Games, and another blessed sleep time!

I hope everyone enjoys their weekend. :)

Co Jordan Fishing (Yes, the fish tasted yummier because I caught it myself).

That phrase in the parenthesis was supposed to go here, as a one-liner starter for this post. I thought the title was boring, so I lifted it up. But really, it tasted so much better because the taste of experience was added onto it.

On the day Mama was to go back to work at Batangas, after attending Sunday mass, we went to have our lunch at Co Jordan Eatery at Liloan. It was my second time in there — the first was the day before, to survey the area. Then we decided to call upon the whole gang (by gang, I mean family) to try something new.

One thing I can say about the place, is that it is super peaceful. No sound of “The City”. It is windy, quiet, and relaxing. As some people might not know (though it is obvious), I am a lover of quiet places. So this place was a total heaven for me.

Sadly though, of all people, it was me who broke the silence.

That is not my “maarte” face. That’s my freaking-out face.

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Lucky are those who realize their passion before college.

Because I did now that I’m in the middle of it. At first I thought, I love it because I want to escape from where I am now. But after months of thinking real deep about it I realized I really do like to teach.

Where I am now, coding and programming, I realize that I will not be able to passionately teach these things to other people. I have never pictured myself as a programming teacher anyway.

I have this need to have receivers of what I learn. Like, I want to learn for others. I particularly like to teach children. The world is demanding for “perfect” people and a child’s mind is like a sponge, absorbing anything shown to them. In their early age, they should be provided with the right foundation and be shown the right things while not dictating them who they should be and who they should become. Helping them to realize their own dreams before they reach my situation. But of course, I am aware that parents are the primary teachers of a child.

Then why are you where you are right now, you might ask.

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Banks and Personality Tests

are creepy. I still haven’t gotten over the fact that personality test are mostly made up of general terms but.. It’s creepy when the question goes

Q: Something is near your foot. What is it?

My answer: Mirror

Q: Will You pick it up?

My answer: Yes

And voila, results say that… on second thought, never mind. Embarrassing.

And about banks… I am scared of them. I was sent to pay some bills this morning and the very sight of ladies behind desks and men in suits and guards and papers to fill out and money just makes my heart beat fast.

This has to go away.

Christmas 2011: Karaoke + St. James Amusement Park + Shabu Way Restaurant

Hey, how was Christmas?

Mine was..

First off, me and my family celebrated it the way we like it: karaokeee. And oh, watch neighbors light up fireworks and firecrackers I, have no name for. 

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My first Forever 21 experience.

(Photo source)

Today, I got the chance to finally see Forever 21, the selfishly occupying fashion store at SM City Cebu North Wing. This very long store ate up more or less 3 stores (Leona’s bakeshop, Powerbooks, and uhmm, forgot). But it gave the space it occupied some justice.

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